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A lot of us carry around “baggage” or “clutter” in our minds.
When I say this I mean- holding onto things that you say you should do but don’t, a person who you had a row with but both are not speaking to each other – but both want to, the could’s and should’s in your life that hold you back – you need to let go, but you don’t.
This weight can get heavy.
Are you like this?
If you are, it may have a negative influence on your confidence and self esteem.
The Approach
Take a look at your life and get rid of this baggage by asking yourself a series of questions and by completing the following exercise.
In effect, what we are doing is making certain tasks “complete”, drawing a line under them and moving on.
Another term for this is “psychological completion” or just “completion.”
The following set of questions can be taken at one sitting or over a number of hours/days.
By writing the answers down they become more formal.
1. Putting up with!
· Make a list of 10 things that you are putting up with at home
· Make a list of 10 things that you are putting up with at work
· Make a list of 10 things that you are putting up with in any other area of your life
· Make an action plan to get rid of/communicate these things that you have been putting up with
2. Unfinished matters!
· Make a list of things that are unresolved/unfinished in your life
· Make an action plan of how to reduce this number!
· Do you need to clear the air with anyone? If so, just do it! Or does walking away from it change your future? Make the decision.
· Did you ever say that you were going to call someone or keep in touch with someone yet have done nothing about it, feel guilty? If yes, call them or send a message to them today
· Let go of as many could’s, would’s, should’s, maybe, ought’s as you can. Write these down.
3. Your standards!
· Write down the standards that you have been saying to yourself that you should have; let go of these and write down a list of the standards that you are going to have in your life from this day forward.
· List 5 people who you admire the most. Identify their greatest qualities, behavior and how they lead their life. What standards so they have? What standards could you raise on your own?
· Respect that other’s standards will be different from your own. Think of 5 close colleagues or friends – what are their standards and how are they different to yours?
By completing these exercises you will be able to focus more on the here the now and the future.
You will now be able to let go of some of the things that have been taking up your valuable attention units – those things that knock your self esteem!